Monday, January 18, 2010

Now You've Done It...

Forgive my foray into politics for a moment, but something needs to be said about the nail-biter of a Senate race going on here in Massachusetts. Both of these candidates are imbeciles. Thankfully, they are simply placeholders to serve out the rest of Kennedy's term. Unfortunately, the first vote either of them will cast in the Senate will have incredibly far-reaching repercussions. Neither side can afford to lose this election and are pulling out all the stops. For Martha Coakley, this means recruiting the president himself to make a fluff appearance in the aftermath of the Haiti disaster. This is the political equivalent to having your parents help you with a book report you haven't started the night before it is due. It's going to suck, but all you want to do is pass. For Scott Brown, this means selling his soul to the rabid drones of the "Tea Party" movement and all that entails.

In Massachusetts, having two democratic senators is as much a foregone conclusion as Bill Belichick wearing one of these numbers on Sunday afternoon. Only an incredibly inept campaign and an aw-shucks candidate (DID YOU HEAR HE DRIVES A TRUCK??!) could buck this trend. While Coakley shmoozed and and treated her campaign like a victory lap, Brown quietly and steadily rose in the polls until last week when someone on Coakley's staff had to be the buzzkill and point out that the race had become a toss-up. Since said wake-up call, Coakley has responded with a punchdrunk mix of attack ads and nonsensical speeches, desperately trying to stop the bleeding.

Tomorrow will reveal whether she managed to turn things around in time, but regardless of whether she pulls it off, her campaign has been an epic study of hubris. It's too bad there is so much riding on it, because as much as I'd love to see her lose, I'll still be pulling the lever for her tomorrow afternoon. I'll just pretend its for Ted.

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